Sunday, April 3, 2011

This too shall pass.

All things come to an end; both the good, and the bad.  I know this to be true, but that doesn't mean it's always easy to come to terms with the ending of one of those good things.

Last week, I finally came to terms with the fact that it is not a good financial choice to continue to have Rose in our lives.  I think if I'm honest with myself, it's been weighing on me for a few weeks and it's certainly been hovering beneath the surface for a couple months now.  I hated to admit it to myself.

Life always just comes down to choices.  I want to start a family, and I want to be able to maintain commitments I made before Rose came along.  Rose just turned 9 years old in March, she's healthy and fun and a great horse, and for someone else she will be a wonderful friend - just like she was for Teri and I.

Yesterday a young woman came out to see Rose.  She and Rose got along famously from the very start and I feel like a huge load has been lifted from my shoulders, because I have a really good feeling about Amber.  Amber has five acres and one mustang gelding, and she's been searching for a mare with a big heart and a lot of spunk.  She rode Rose, and seeing them together was bittersweet, for sure.  On the one hand, seeing someone else ride her made me feel sick and sad.  On the other hand, I could see how well they went together and I just knew that I was doing the right thing.

When I put Rose up for sale, Amber was the very first one to contact me and immediately I felt good about her.  She emailed me not an hour after the ad went up.  Things that are meant to happen fall into place sometimes, isn't that funny?

Anyway, I wanted to tell you all because you are important to me and you followed our journey with Rose and Remi, and I know you guys know how much the horses have meant to me.  I feel certain that someday, Teri and I will have a couple horses come into our lives again, for us and for our children.

I want everyone to know that what I need right now is just support of the decision I've already made.  I don't need to hear lament about not being able to keep them and how it's just too bad, or questioning if selling her is really the best choice.  I've already made the choice to sell her, and Rose already showed me that my choice of her new owner is a good one.

This is the right thing for everyone involved, and knowing that Rose is going to a wonderful, loving home makes my grief just a bit lighter.  The lump in my throat has almost dissolved and the knot in the pit of my stomach is loosening its grip on me.

I appreciate you all and your friendship very much.

Love always,
Ashleigh

3 comments:

  1. We wish you and Teri lots of luck and love in this new phase of your lives.
    Dennis & Carrie

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  2. With love, pride, hope, and excitement for the future (for you/Teri & Amber/Rose) I say, "I'm with you my girl." I have loved every moment shared with your beautiful equines!

    Your writing connects me directly to you, and from behind my glossy eyes I want you to know that I'm right there with you. Standing with you, shoulder to shoulder, arm around you tight. It's gonna be okay.

    I'm not quite able to talk about things yet either, still have the lump since our texts. But, I will share with Dad, Hay, and friends when I am able. It takes time for the heart to get more in line with the head sometimes. (Love has a way of doing that.)

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  3. Oh, Ash...tough decision, but sounds like you made it by considering the best for you, Teri, horses and the direction you want to take your life. You "kids" are growing up! Best of luck.

    Mary

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